Xavier Nady Saves Pirates From Their Own Ineptitude

Nady hits a pair of opposite field home runs to bail out the Pirates' Steve Blass like effort from the bullpen, not to mention Jason Bay's embarrassing ninth inning brain fart which allowed the Braves to tie the game.

If that's how the rest of the season is going to go...eh. Settle in, it's going to be a long one. Thanks to MGP for the picture.

Pens Lose In Overtime, Can't Clinch Division

Considering the Penguins were asleep for the first 30 minutes of the game (they registered four shots in a period-and-a-half) getting one point out of the night is fine by me.

Sergei Gonchar took a penalty in overtime and the Rangers won it roughly a minute later when Chris Drury -- I hear he scores big goals in big games because he's a big time player, and that's what big time player do, they score big goals in big games -- stepped into a slapshot and fired it through a Hal Gill screen. That's problematic for the Penguins because, obviously, Hal Gill plays for the Penguins.

As it stands today, for the Penguins to not win the Atlantic Division title, they'll have to lose their final two games, while New Jersey will have to win four games in a row. Hell, another overtime loss for the Penguins will clinch it.

Max Talbot scored the only goal for the Penguins.

And Here Come The Pirates...

Tonight, baseball season officially begins -- well, technically it started earlier this week when Oakland and Boston played in Japan, but nobody saw that -- when the Atlanta Braves take on the Washington Nationals. Should be fun, assuming Elijiah Dukes doesn't go batshit crazy in the middle of the game and punch someone.

Then, tomorrow night, the Pirates open up their season in Atlanta when Ian Snell takes the mound against the crafty veteran Tom Glavine.

A couple of Pirates season previews from the local scribes:

Pittsburgh Post-Gazette: Could Winning Blow Up The Blueprint?

Pittsburgh Tribune-Review: Q & A's with the Buc's new management - no questions on how many home runs "change in atmosphere" will hit.

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Will this be the group that ends the string of futility? All signs point to no, no it won't be. The only thing that seems to be in the Pirates' favor at the start of the season is the fact the National League Central is again setting itself up to be a disaster wrapped inside of an embarrassment. If the first place team ends up with 87 wins I'll be surprised (85 and 83 won it the last two years).

Outside of the bullpen, this is exactly the same team that lost 95 games in back-t0-back years, so it seems understandable that excitement for the start of the season is at an all-time low. Honestly, nobody seems to care, especially with the Penguins rolling right along.

Fortunately, the Pirates could improve their standing in the rest of the National League simply by default.

- The San Francisco Giants look to be the early season favorites to wrestle the "worst team in the league" title away from the Pirates. Matt Cain and Tim Lincecum are an awesome 1-2 punch at the top of the rotation, but that first step after that is quite a leap.

Barry Zito seems to be a shell of his former self, and this quote from manager Bruce Bochy in The San Franisco Chronicle is kind of odd and comical.

A Fresno TV reporter asked manager Bruce Bochy if Zito was still his Opening Day starter. Bochy smiled and said, "It's a little too late to change now."

Exciting. Even worse than the rotation after the big-two is the horrible excuse for a lineup. In 2007 the Giants ranked 29th in the league in runs scored, and this year they'll have to find a way to replace Barry Bonds who, while a liability in left field, and a total douchebag of a person, was still the most productive hitter on the team -- and perhaps the league -- last season. To be fair, it's not all bad as Dave Roberts will bring a much needed infusion of youth to the left field position in the Bay - He's 35.

Former Pirate Jose Castillo will man the third base position, and it's important to point out that in 2007, among the 322 players who had at least 225 plate appearances, Jose Castillo finished:

Batting Average: 263
On-Base Percentage: 319
Slugging Percentage: 303
OPS: 314
Walks: 322 (He drew six walks in 2007, and two of them were intentional).

- Closer to home, in the Central, the Cincinnati Reds have turned their franchise over to Dusty Baker, who has seemingly built his reputation around letting Barry Bonds and Jeff Kent hit a bunch of home runs for him while effectively destroying every young pitcher he's ever had under his control.




The Reds have perhaps the best prospect in Baseball -- center fielder Jay Bruce -- and banished him back to Triple-A so Baker could trot out one of his pet projects from Chicago -- Corey Patterson -- as the starter in center field and lead-off hitter. The good thing, however, is that with Patterson manning the lead-off spot (he of the .298 career on-base percentage) Baker won't have to worry about anyone clogging up the bases.

“No. 1, I’ve let most guys hit 3-0 (in the count). That’s one reason. . . . I think walks are overrated unless you can run. If you get a walk and put the pitcher in a stretch, that helps, but the guy who walks and can’t run, most of the time he’s clogging up the bases for somebody who can run.”

The other top prospect in the Reds organization, first baseman Joey Votto, will begin the season on the bench so grizzled vet (and mediocre player) Scott Hatteberg can man the first base position.

So this is where we're at - contemplating who might be worse than the Pirates in the upcoming season. Just a little depressing.

What do the Pirates need to remain interesting? They need Ian Snell, Tom Gorzelanney and Paul Maholm to continue to improve, and most importantly, stay healthy. They need Jason Bay to rebound from a disastrous 2007 season. They need Freddy Sanchez to regain his 2006 form. They need a baseball miracle.

The only different starter in the lineup from 2007 is center fielder Nate Mclouth, and he was on the team last season, just as a backup for most of the season. He's a solid enough player, and could prove to be a very good starter in center field, but it speaks volumes about the state of your franchise when he could be one of the best all-around everyday players on your 25-man roster, and that may not be much of a stretch with Mclouth.

Think about it, who on the team is a more complete player? Jason Bay comes to mind if he's healthy, but he seems to be one of the biggest question marks on a team full of gigantic question marks. Mclouth is a good fielder, finished last season with the best OPS on the team (well, Ryan Doumit was slightly higher in 100 fewer at-bats) and is an excellent base-runner/base-stealer - 34-of-36 for his career in stolen bases. If he can simply repeat what he did last season, he'd be the best lead-off hitter the team has had in quite some time.

The best case scenario for the team, long-term, would be a bounce back season from Bay (sadly, so they could trade him) and continued development from Snell, Gorzelanney and Maholm in the rotation.

Hopefully by mid-season Neil Walker will have done enough in Indianapolis to take over the third base job, and once Xavier Nady pops his shoulder out of place or pulls his hamstring for the 840th time, we'll get to see what Steve Pearce can do in a real, full-time role. Hopefully.

Prediction: No fewer than 70 wins, no more than 74, fifth place in the NL Central thanks to Dusty Baker.

Penguins Beat Rangers, 3-1, Tighten Grip On Atlantic Division

AP Photo

Marian Hossa, Evgeni Malkin and Max Talbot all scored goals for Pittsburgh, while Marc-Andre Fleury turned aside 26-of-27 shots in the win.

Huge win for the Penguins as it gives them an eight point lead over the Rangers --and a six point advantage over New Jersey -- with just a week to play in the regular season.

Tight-checking, physical game all day, and it was nice to see the Penguins answer the call and out-hit the Rangers 33-20. Georges Laraque dished out the best one early in the first period when he steamrolled Rangers' defenseman Christian Backman.

Other stuff:

- For the second game in a row the Penguins fourth line of Max Talbot-Georges Laraque-Jarkko Ruutu contributed strong minutes. Talbot registered the only point for the trio (a late goal in the third period) but they played a strong puck possession game, highlighted in the second period with a 2-minute shift where they kept New York pinned it its own end, almost as if the Rangers weren't even on the ice. The shift didn't result in a goal, but it was the type of effort you want to see from your fourth line, especially in a playoff type game.

The line also accounted for nine of the Penguins' 33 hits, while only accounting for 26-minutes of ice-time, combined.

- In a somewhat shocking turn, the Penguins actually won the faceoff battle today with a 30-25 edge. Sidney Crosby led the way with a 62% effort (13-of-21) while Jordan Staal was 60% (9-of-15). Impressive feat when you consider the Rangers entered the game as the No. 2 faceoff team in the league, while Pittsburgh came in as the worst.

- Interesting nugget from Larry Brooks of The New York Post (take with a grain of salt): The increase in the NHL's salary cap could be larger than originally thought heading into next season. Marian Hossa approves.

- I've been riding Ryan Whitney most of the season for playing like he's carrying around a purse, so I'll give him credit where it's due: I enjoyed watching him ride 200-year old Brendan Shanahan into the corner boards in the second period. When the ancient Shanahan wouldn't let him skate away, Whitney grabbed his helmet and shoved him away, knocking his head gear off in the process. It's the most intensity and edge we've seen from Whitney all season.

You're 6-foot-4, 220 pounds. Use it, man.

Penguins Win 3-1, Lose Marian Hossa Again

AP Photo

On the night Sidney Crosby returned to the lineup, it was Jarkko Ruutu and Georges Laraque who provided the offense for Pittsburgh. The fourth-liners combined for five points, including a career-high three from Ruutu. Each player finished a fight shy of the Brendan Shanahan hat trick, though it wasn't for a lack of opportunities.

Laraque scored his goal in the third period on a mini-breakaway and seemed to fan on the puck initially, before regaining control and slipping it past Islanders goalie Wade Dubielewicz. Once Wade realized the puck went in, he instantly threw his arms in the air and covered his face, almost as if to say, "I can't believe I just gave up a damn goal to Georges Laraque." Well, you did. Deal.

Evgeni Malkin scored his 45th goal of the season early in the first period.

Marian Hossa was injured on two separate occasions during the game, the first coming in the second period when some third-rate NHLer named Rob Davison came in low -- and late -- at his knee and took him out long after Hossa dished off the puck. Hossa went to the locker room and returned just moments later. It wasn't quite a Willie Reed moment in the annals of sports history, but it was a little reassuring to see him back on the ice after instantly grabbing at the same knee he injured a month ago.

Then, in the third period Islanders forward Sean Bergenheim clipped Hossa from behind, dropping him like a sack of bricks in the neutral zone. Hossa skated off the ice with what appeared to be a serious case of concussion eyes, though the Penguins gave the typical NHL playoff injury report and simply referred to it as, "an upper body injury." This is like Bill Belichick listing Tom Brady as questionable with a shoulder every week.

In both situations Davison and Bergenheim were immediately dealt with.

- We've been waiting to see Crosby and Hossa play together for a month. When Hossa was originally acquired, Crosby was injured. Then Hossa was injured. The Crosby returned. Then Crosby was injured. The Hossa returned. While Crosby was injured. Then Crosby returned and Hossa was injured.

- For the second game in a row Ryan Whitney played left wing -- he logged 11-minutes -- and the Penguins allowed one goal. That's two games with Whitney off the blue line...with one goal allowed...total. I'll let you draw your own conclusions. Okay, maybe it's because the games were against New Jersey and the Islanders, but that doesn't change my mind that Whitney has been a menace to himself and everyone else on the ice this season when he tries to play defense.

Perhaps it's a good message to send. Errey and Steigerwald commented during the game how Daryl Sydor once played all three forward positions in a game during his Dallas days, and how Paul Coffey and Phil Housley also spent brief periods of time at the forward position early in their careers. Those guys turned out to be solid, useful players and had decent, productive careers. So, it's not like this little message/experiment is going to ruin Whitney's career or development and send him down a troubled path of drugs, debauchery and meatball subs as he eats his way out of the league before he's 28 in an effort to deal with his depression...unless he's more fragile than any of us could have possibly imagined.

- Leading by two with under a minute to play, and an empty net at the opposite end of the ice, Penguins goalie Marc-Andre Fleury corralled a loose puck behind his goal and attempted to fire it the length of the ice in an effort to score a goal. The puck hit off of Brooks Orpik's ass and almost became a goal for the Islanders. It didn't work, but I'm glad he took the shot. At least in that situation. One-goal game? Not so much. Two-goal game? Go for it.

Local College Notes; Kenny Mayne An Author?

Kenny Mayne wrote a book? Yup. We'll get to that in a moment.

I've been missing in action, mourning the end of college basketball and college hockey in the local area in the past few weeks. First Duquesne bowed out, losing in the Atlantic-10 Tournament. Then Robert Morris choked away a sure-thing Northeast Conference title, followed quickly by a despicable performance by the RMU hockey team in their conference tournament. Pitt won the Big East, the Lady Panthers earned a solid seed in the women's tournament along with the 15th seeded Lady Colonials. Robert Morris earned their first NIT bid only to fall short in an upset bid in Syracuse before the Lady Colonials were destroyed by Rutgers and Pitt coughed up a Sweet 16 bid to Michigan State.

So, now we wait. Will Sam Young go pro? Will Mercedes Walker and the Lady Panthers stay on their march? And how soon will Ryan Cruthers be wearing the blue and orange of the New York Islanders?

Yes, suddenly the Robert Morris ice hockey team is churning out pro talent. Six different seniors, including Cruthers, have signed professional contracts in the last week. All but Cruthers will be playing in the ECHL or IHL. Cruthers signed a dual contract with the Bridgeport Sound of the AHL and the Utah Grizzlies of the ECHL. He will spend one week or so in the ECHL before moving up in the Islanders' system to play in the AHL.

Cruthers finished fifth in the nation in scoring this year for Robert Morris, scoring 22 goals and 27 assists in 34 games.

Robert Morris seniors appearing in a minor league ice rink near you during the rest of the season (stats accrued in latest season with RMU):
F Sean Berkstresser - Wheeling Nailers of the ECHL (9 goals, 16 assists in 33 games)
D Chris Kaufman - Bakersfield Condors of the ECHL (3 goals, 13 assists in 34 games)
F Tom Biondich - Gwinnett Gladiators of the ECHL (5 goals, 6 assists in 31 games)
D Rob Cowan - Port Huron of the IHL (2 assists, 32 PIM in 22 games)
D Joel Gasper - Johnstown of the ECHL (7 assists, 41 PIM in 22 games)

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Kenny Mayne is publishing a book, thankfully NOT about Dancing with the Stars. "An Incomplete and Inaccurate History of Sport:...and Other Random Thoughts from Childhood to Fatherhood" is due out April 22nd and from all indications, it's supposed to be quite bizarre. Even the official release on the website is quite strange, stating, in part: "Part nostalgic memoir (like the summer Mark Sansaver hit 843 home runs in backyard Wiffle ball), part Dave Barry-esque riffs (like explaining bocce to non-Italians), part scholarly tract (includes the origins of tackle football), and part metafiction (see “Time-outs”)... all with illustrations drawn by Kenny’s daughters, it is what Kenny calls his anti coffee-table book, or Coaster. The publisher calls it $24.95."

Right.

Either way, I love Kenny Mayne. Besides Tom Robbins' new novella, this might be my most anticipated literary piece to come out in 2008.

Fortunately, we have a preview of what to expect. Mayne includes some various musings on the website linked at the beginning of this post, and he also has an excerpt posted. It's, um, strange.

Lots of people call badminton “bad-mitten.”

Those people don”t know what they are talking about.

In badminton, your father takes about three hours to set up a net because there are rocks under the grass where he is trying to jam the posts in.

In the meantime, you and your friends kill each other with jokes about how the thing you are supposed to hit over the net, if your dad ever gets it set up, is called a “shuttlecock.”

You keep repeating “shuttlecock” over and over. Eventually, one of your friends laughs so hard he pees his pants and has to go home to change clothes.

Shuttlecock.

I just peed my pants and would have to go home to change my clothes except I’m already home.

So. There's that. Expect a full review when the book is released right here on The Black and Gold Blog.

Booger's Agent Says No Deal Yet; Pirates-Braves Make A Trade

First the important news...According Mike Florio at PFT, the agent for BOOGER McFarland says no deal has been reached with the Steelers; Florio links this Tribune-Review article as his source.

So much for that. Until it changes. Again.

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In other news, the Pirates and Braves teamed up last night to make a blockbuster trade that is likely to send a wave of hysteria through Major League Baseball. Take notice Wrigleyville, we're coming for you.

That's right, the Pirates acquired right-handed relief pitcher Tyler Yates from Atlanta, in exchange for minor league pitching prospect Todd Redmond.


I think that about sums it up.

According to Baseball America, Todd Redmond was the 27th best prospect in what is, I think, the 28th best farm system in Baseball...that probably makes him the 640th best prospect in baseball, or something.

As for Tyler Yates...well, neither one of these guys is going to do anything to keep the Pirates from losing 87 games for the next six seasons.

Granted, the Pirates need more relievers like Kim Kardashian needs more ass, but Yates might be somewhat useful out of the pen (emphasis on might) for a small stretch, simply because he can get some strikeouts.

If there's one thing to like about the relief pitchers Neil Huntington has signed this off-season, it's the fact they all seem to be power guys who can miss bats. This of course differs from Dave Littlefield, who stockpiled soft-tossers like Brian Meadows, Frank Brooks, and Masumi Kuwata who excelled in throwing batting practice.

Steelers Sign Booger

According to The Post-Gazette, the Pittsburgh Steelers have signed free agent defensive lineman Booger McFarland to a contract. Four free agents in one off-season? Insanity!

I know very little about McFarland outside of the obvious:

- His real name is Anthony, but he will always be known as "Booger," a major plus in my view.

- He had a reasonably productive career in Tampa Bay before being traded to Indianapolis for a second round pick.

- He was cut by Indianapolis this off-season for failing his physical.

Can he still play? Hopefully. If he can, I have to assume he'd be an upgrade in depth over Nick Eason and Travis Kirschke because, well, because it would be difficult to be worse.

Mike Florio of Pro Football Talk speculates that this could be the beginning of Mike Tomlin's inevitable takeover of the defense, where he banishes the 3-4 forever and installs his own 4-3 system, as people have been expecting him to do ever since he became the Head Coach of the Steelers.

On the surface, the addition of McFarland makes sense because he was in Tampa
while Steelers coach Mike Tomlin served as defensive backs coach there.
But the move makes us wonder whether Tomlin is plotting to begin the
formal transition from the time-honored (in Pittsburgh) 3-4 defense to
the 4-3, Tampa Two attack.

I think in time it's possible that will happen, probably very likely. But I'm not sure the signing of a 30-year old, 10-year veteran that may not even be a lock to make the team, or be ready for week one, is a signal that it's coming any time soon.

Penguins Beat Devils, 2-0, In Front Of Empty Arena

Looking at the brand new Prudential Center in New Jersey you would have never guessed there was a rather large late season game taking place between two teams fighting for a division championship...the place was empty.

The only noise drifting down from the stands was a brief spurt of anger directed at the referees for waiving off a potential Devils goal (to be fair, they had a point, it was a pretty questionable call) and a chorus of boos throughout the third period. It's really incredible that such a successful franchise, with a brand new arena, and one of the best goalies to ever play can't even fill the place for a huge game late in the season.

For the opening two periods, the Penguins played one of their finest defensive games of the season, blocking shots, back checking aggressively and essentially beating the Devils at their own game in their house. It was impressive, and a nice turnaround after taking a massive dump between the sheets last night.

The third period was all about Marc-Andre Fleury as he made save after save (17 in the third period, 33 for the game) and recorded his fourth shutout of the season.

Couple of things.......

- With Sidney Crosby still out with his ankle injury, Pascal Dupuis in Atlanta with his wife after she gave birth, and Chris Minard out with some sort of groin pull, the Penguins found themselves down a forward. The solution? Ryan Whitney! Anything that gets him off the blue line is a plus, and with him only playing 11-minutes for the game, all at forward, I don't think it's a coincidence that the Penguins recorded the shutout. Okay, I don't really mean that...but I'm not really kidding either.

- According to ESPN.com's box score, the Penguins blocked 14 shots, including four from Hal Gill. Speaking of which, Gill has actually been somewhat useful the past couple of games. As someone who wasn't exactly thrilled with his addition at the end of February, I have to say that he hasn't been bad after a miserable first couple of games. He still looks like he's trying to skate with tennis rackets on his feet in a pit of sand, but hey...he hasn't been bad.

- Ryan Malone scored what turned out to be the game-winner early in the first period, while Marian Hossa chipped in the empty-netter to seal the win. Hossa deserved the easy goal after dominating the game defensively. While he was obviously acquired for his offense, his defensive game is equally impressive.

- The victory for the Penguins clinches a playoff spot. See.

This Is What Happens When You Look Ahead

Eh.

The Penguins are now 2-6 in Ty Conklin's last eight starts. I'd say the goaltender controversy has played itself out.

Penguins Crush Devils, 7-1; Martin Broduer Gets Chased

Heading into tonight, the Penguins and Devils had identical records and were set to throw down in what had to be an epic regular season contest. For two periods, that looked like what was happening, and then, for whatever reason...the Devils mailed it in during the third. I mean, those guys friggin' quit. Perhaps the worst period of hockey I've watched a team play all season. Just awful. And it was beautiful.

The Penguins scored five third period goals, including a pair from Evgeni Malkin -- to give him 44 on the season, and 101 points -- while only allowing New Jersey to register only four harmless shots on Marc-Andre Fleury, who had a totally uneventful night in the crease. The Penguins could have sat him on the bench, put an extra skater on the ice for the entire third period, and still won the game.

The only goal on the night for the Devils was an incredible display of hand-eye coordination from Brian Gionta, as he batted a saucer pass from John Madden out of mid-air from about 20 feet out. Several Pirates scouts in attendance immediately looked to sign him while John Russell wondered if he could handle third base.

Amazingly, this is the third game in the past two weeks where the Penguins have put up seven goals without the services of captain, defending league scoring champion and best player in the world* Sidney Crosby.

Ryan Malone also chipped in a pair of goals, while Marian Hossa tallied three assists and Pascal Dupuis scored a goal and set-up Malone's second goal of the game - a short-handed goal late in the second period.

- Elsewhere around the Eastern Conference tonight, things became interesting as the Canadiens beat Boston in a shootout to maintain their lead for the top spot in the Eastern Conference -- one point ahead of the Penguins -- while Toronto stormed back in Ottawa to keep its slim playoff hopes.

With Toronto's win, there are now only four points separating seeds 7-12. The last couple of weeks are going to be a complete battle royale for not only the top seeds, but the bottom seeds as well.

How hilarious would it be if Toronto, of all teams, found a way to sneak into the eighth and final playoff spot? Especially after that soap opera at the trade deadline about what the team should do with Mats Sundin, or what he should do with his no-trade clause, or...whatever the hell it is they talk about up there.

- Pascal Dupuis watch: Two points tonight giving him 11 in 11 games since being acquired from Atlanta.

- Colby Armstrong/Erik Christensen watch: Nobody cares anymore.




*It's possible, if not likely, that Malkin is better.

I've Got Nothing, So Here Is A Youtube Of Mike Milbury Beating A Fan With His Own Shoe

Question: So, Mike, was this the most embarrassing moment of your NHL career?

Answer: No, that would be the day I traded Roberto Luongo and Olli Jokinen for Oleg Kvasha and Mark Parrish.

Milbury's career is a never-ending cycle of hilarity; from his irrational, short sighted trades that made absolutely no sense to anyone but him, to his colorful and often times insane quotes. His wikipedia page features some of his best moments.

About agent Paul Kraus

Kraus was the agent for Islanders' star forward Žigmund Pálffy. He and Milbury frequently butted heads.

• "I think the agent is a moron and way in over his head."
• "It's too bad he lives in the city. He's depriving some small village of a pretty good idiot."
• "We hope that Ziggy will come to his senses. We have no hope Paul Kraus will."

Why The Penguins Won't Become "Tampa Bay North"

Three weeks ago when the Penguins traded for Marian Hossa in the deadlines biggest blockbuster, Penguins fans, for the most part, found themselves in an undeniable state of pure ecstasy. How could we not? Our team had landed the big prize that every team in reasonable contention for the playoffs was after; one of the top players in the league and a legitimate top-3 forward to play alongside Sidney Crosby.

It was great. Of course, no one planned on him spraining his MCL in the second period of his first game, thus knocking him out of the lineup for two weeks, but hey...shit happens.

Of course, there is always that person sitting in the back of the room, regardless of how good things may seem, trying to pee in the apple jacks, and in this case, it was hockey analyst Pierre McGuire. McGuire has repeatedly voiced his concerns on how the Penguins could become the newest version of the Tampa Bay Lightning, or, in his words, "Tampa Bay North."

What does that mean? Well, it means they will have invested too much in a small core of players, eating up far too much cap space and not having the ability to fill in around the small core of stars.

I've looked up the stuff, crunched the numbers, wasted the time, and considered all the data.

Two reasons why this won't happen with the Penguins, assuming of course, they re-sign Hossa (I admit, this could be a problem as Hossa will want to test free agency in search of the gigantic pay day he's going to receive, regardless of where he plays).

1. I'm going to steal this from ESPN's John Buccigross, but, one of the biggest reasons the Lightning fell off the map so quickly is because they have drafted terribly.

That said, don't keep bringing up Tampa Bay and its big three players. Tampa Bay got bad fast because it drafted badly, traded badly and signed free agents badly.

Yes, yes, yes.

In 1998 the Lightning used their first and second round picks on Vincent Lecavalier and Brad Richards, two thirds of their big three (Martin St. Louis was the other). Two incredible picks. But, since that draft, the Lightning have wasted just about every single pick in the draft, and failed to land even one impact player, even with a pair of top-10 picks the following years which were blown on tremendous failures Alexandr Svitov and Nikita Alxeev.

To break it down, from 1999-2006 the Lightning had 79 picks in the amateur draft, of which, only 15 have managed to crack the NHL for a combined 1,286 games (including this season).

Not a single impact player in the group. The most notable player? Defenseman Paul Ranger who has played 219 games for Tampa.

Ranger has also put up the most points in the NHL, registering 75.

By comparison, over the same time period, the Penguins have had 76 picks in the amateur draft and managed to find 26 NHL players. The group has played over 3,000 games in the league, and registered over 1,454 points.

Granted, the Penguins had the luxury of selling off star players for pennies on the dollar (screw you, Craig Patrick - but that's another discussion for another day) and hitting the mother load with Evgeni Malkin and Sidney Crosby.

But, the Penguins have managed to find players in later rounds.

- Ryan Malone, fourth round
- Max Talbot, eighth round
- Kris Letang, third round
- Daniel Carcillo, third round (traded to Phoenix for Georges Laraque)
- Erik Christensen, third round (traded to Atlanta for Marian Hossa)
- Jonathan Filewich, third round
- Michel Oullet, fourth round
- Tyler Kennedy, fourth round

As Buccigross states in his column, the Lightning have fallen into irrelevance because they've drafted terribly. The Penguins, however, have not. They've managed to find useful players in later rounds to either (1) use as complimentary players to the franchise building blocks, Crosby and Malkin, or (2) use as trade bait to land other useful assets; Hossa, Gary Roberts.

It's a really good thing, and there's more on the way with Alex Goligoski, Kevin Velluex and Luca Caputi.

2. Sidney Crosby, Evgeni Malkin, and Marian Hossa are a substantially better trio than Vincent Lecavalier, Brad Richards and Martin St. Louis.

Make no mistake, Lecavalier, Richards and St. Louis are all good players, but only Lecavalier is really a top-shelf, front-line, upper echelon NHLer, and even he, until the past two seasons, has been more hype than reality. This season, and last season, are going to be the only years in Vinny's career where he's eclipsed the 85-point mark. Granted, that's a difficult thing to do and only your top players are capable of doing on a consistent basis; Lecavalier has done it twice in nine years...Crosby has done it twice in three years (would have been three-for-three had it not been for his ankle injury this season) while Malkin has done it twice in two years.

Richards and St. Louis, meanwhile, are very good players who managed to have one or two great seasons here and there.

Crosby and Malkin appear as if they are going to be competing for the scoring title every season, and if the team can manage to re-sign Hossa, the Penguins are going to have three of the best players in the NHL skating on their top two lines. I fail to see how this can be anything but a positive. Cap space be damned.

Especially when you've been able to select useful players in later rounds, and have a general manager who has proven he is able to find useful, cheap veterans floating around the NHL (See: Jeff Taffe, Gary Roberts, Mark Eaton --on the rare occasion that he's actually not hurt).

Plus, and as I've said before, the same day the Lightning traded away Richards for Dallas' spare parts and other assorted swag, they re-signed 31-year old defensemen Dan Boyle to a 7-year, $40 million contract. That's absurd.

To review:

1. Penguins draft better
2. Penguins have better players
3. Jay Feaster is a moron for thinking Dan Boyle, at the age of 31, is worth $40 million over seven years.

Ty Conklin's Brick Wall Is Coming Down

First things first, so let's just throw it out there at the beginning... The Penguins would not be where they are right now if it weren't for the 20-game stretch where Ty Conklin stood on his head and played like he was the spawn of Martin Broduer and Patrick Roy. He was awesome, powerful and "the backbone of a great rhythm and blues band that was capable of turning goat piss into gasoline."

Unfortunately, and everyone should have known this, it was only a matter of time before he turned back into Ty Conklin; journeyman backup, not-so-good goalie, not quite the spawn of Broduer and Roy.

It appears as if that time has come.

Conklin received the start in New York tonight and gave up five goals on 30 shots. Though, to be fair, one of those goals wasn't really his fault. The Rangers third goal, which proved to be the game-winner, was all on Penguins defenseman Ryan Whitney as he continues to play like he's a glorified version of Dick Tarnstrom. Only softer. Much softer. Charmin soft.

Whitney, as he tends to do when faced with any sort of pressure in his face, blindly fired a pass to the middle of the ice in his own zone where Rangers forward Fredrik Sjostrom just happened to be sitting. Sjostrom took the pass, walked in on Conklin all alone, and slipped a shot in behind him to give the Rangers the lead. Difficult to blame Conklin for that. Impossible to blame him, actually. Whitney left him out to dry. Whitney stinks. It should be noted however, that it was the best pass Whitney made all night. A crisp tape-to-tape pass, right along the ice, allowing Sjostrom to take the puck in stride. Whitney stinks.

Anyway, over Conklin's last eight games he's posted a .901 save percentage, and that includes his 50-save performance on Long Island. Over his last five games, his save percentage drops to an abysmal .867.

Not exactly what we're looking for.

Jaromir Jagr: The Penguins Days

With the Penguins and Rangers playing Tuesday night, that means it's time for another meeting with old friend Jaromir Jagr. I always preferred Jagr to Lemiuex, even with the irrational mood swings. I don't know why, I just did.

I still miss the mullet.

Steve Pearce Sent To Minors, Adam Laroche And Xavier Nady Remain Mediocre

Sometime in the middle of May the Pirates are going to find themselves already eliminated from post-season contention. In the process of this never ending cycle of madness, Xavier Nady will probably be hitting a mediocre .260 with an on-base percentage in the .310 neighborhood (that is, of course, when he's not on the bench with a pulled or tweaked something-or-other).

Adam Laroche meanwhile, will be aimlessly flailing at 3-2 curve balls in the dirt while he stares awkwardly at his bat -- as if it's somehow the bats fault he missed -- before slowly dragging himself back to the dugout as boos rain down from the stands.

It's going to be awesome.

At the same time, in Indianapolis, reigning minor league player of the year Steve Pearce will probably be doing what he did all last season - hitting home runs. That too, will be awesome...for fans in Indianapolis.

I'm sure we will see Steve Pearce in a Pirates uniform during the 2008 season; it probably won't be until the end of July, when Jason Bay is traded for magic beans and a case of Pabst Blue Ribbon, and everyone has already turned their attention to Steelers training camp, but I suppose he'll be there.

The question then becomes, why isn't he going to be there on April 1? Why has he already been sent to the minors while Doug Mientkiewiecz, Kevin Thompson and Nyjer Morgan remain in the big league camp? Morgan by the way, is still being considered for the center field job despite having Nate Mclouth run circles around him in every possible way. But that's another piece of insanity for another day.

I'm sure there's a logical explanation for all of this. There just has to be.

Perhaps Steve Pearce is an alien and having a difficult time adjusting to the Pirates change in atmosphere. Maybe he's in need of "more seasoning" in the minors. Or -- and this is probably what's going on -- the Pirates are run by a bunch of damn monkeys that couldn't pick out a decent player if it were a flea biting them on their ass. Yeah. That's most likely it.

The Pirates have a position for Pearce to play, in fact, they have two of them. First Base and Right Field. Just because they couldn't trade Nady this off-season doesn't mean he absolutely, positively has to start. Crazy, I know.

If Pearce had struggled, or put up mediocre numbers in the minors last season, it wouldn't be an issue. At least not as big of an issue. The guy simply has nothing left to prove in Triple-A, and for a team that is constantly searching far and wide - or so it claims - for young talent, it's completely ridiculous for them to quickly shuffle a guy who hit over .330 with 31 home runs last season back to the minors.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

It's not that I think Pearce is going to be the second coming of Willie Stargell and put the Pirates franchise on his back and carry it to the promised land. Believe me, I don't think that. I mean, he is after all a product of the Pirates minor league development, so he'll probably end up disappointing all of us in ways we can't even imagine. But at least we'll know for sure and not have to watch guys who have already proven they are not the answer.

Cinderella? If You Insist...

Needless to say, there doesn't appear to be a George Mason in this group. No Cinderella story, no complete underdog ready to run to the Final Four. The few mid-majors equipped to make a run deep in the NCAA Tournament are either high seeds (#3 Xavier) or so well-known (the bizarrely low seeded #7 Butler Bulldogs) that no one will overlook them.

A true Cinderella story comes from a high seed that no one expects to win, maybe not even their opening game.

The other problem is bracket placement. Some of the chic candidates run up early against top seeds, and while no team is perfect in this year's bracket, the top seeds are extremely talented. So, while it may be fun to run with the likes of #10 Davidson, #7 Gonzaga, #9 Kent State, #10 South Alabama, or even #7 Butler, buyer beware. All of those teams face a #1 or #2 seed (potentially) in Round Two.

Cinderella's typically come out of the middle of the bracket where they can get some momentum The above teams may very well win their opening game, but you'll be playing with fire if you pick them to knock off the big dogs early.

That said, of the few candidates, here's who you should keep in mind as an upset candidate as you fill out your brackets:

#11 St. Joseph's (Eastern Region) - Phil Martelli's group is always well-coached, they've come out of the relatively strong Atlantic-10 conference, and they have Oklahoma up first. Should the second-fiddle Philly school come out victorious against the Sooners, they're in the middle of the bracket and wouldn't have to face North Carolina or Tennessee until at least the Sweet 16. The toughest opponent? Round Two could loom with Louisville, but the Hawks have beaten the likes of Xavier (twice) and run well with Syracuse and Gonzaga.

#13 Oral Roberts (South Region) - The tiny school with the funny name and bizarre background certainly doesn't have it easy to start. #4 Pitt is red-hot and extremely physical. But 13s tend to fair well, and the plucky Roberts group has some spunk and physicality with them as well. If they manage to get past Pitt, the Cinderella season truly begins because they are surrounded by the likes of Temple and Michigan State. If someone can surprise Memphis, they could have a clear path to the Elite 8. That's asking a lot of chips to fall in your favor though.

#11 Baylor (West Region) - Wait. A Big 12 school as a Cinderella story? You bet. Even though Baylor's from the big time, they don't play, act, or run themselves like they've won anything. With Xavier/Georgia their match-up if they win, Baylor can easily run to a likely Sweet 16 game against an unimpressive Duke team. Speaking of Baylor's potential 2nd round match-up...

#14 Georgia (West Region) - Yes, another "large" school in the mix as Cinderella, but it's only because the Bulldogs have already been fitted for the glass slipper. Three wins in 30 hours? Bouncing around all of Atlanta in the wake of a tornado to punch their only possible post-season bid - an SEC Championship? Nevermind the talent level of the Bulldogs, they won't win with it. They've been winning with desire and heart, and that is extremely dangerous in the NCAA Tournament.

Those are your options. That's it. Those are the only true Cinderella stories left in this tournament; the rest are all unsurprising picks or almost expected to make a run. Expect a very top heavy tournament.

In the meantime, with the focus on Pitt this week, I hope to provide an inside look at the NIT. If travel works out in my favor, the next report will come from behind the scenes of the "other" post-season basketball tournament.

Pitt Gets A No. 4 Seed And Some Oral (Roberts) In Round One; Bobby Knight Picks Pitt To Win The Whole Thing

There you have it.

Just a minute ago, after a sea of talking heads picked nothing but No. 1 seeds to advance to the final four, Bobby Knight went out on a limb and not only picked Pitt to come out of the South Region, but for the Panthers to win the entire tournament.

Balls.

Penguins Beat Flyers 7-1, Hal Gill Scores A Goal

Well that was certainly fun, and with the seven goal barrage thrown at Flyers goalies Martin Biron and Anterro Niittymaki, the Penguins have now scored 14 goals in their last two games without Sidney Crosby.

Evgeni Malkin and Petr Sykora each scored a pair of goals (40 and 41 for Malkin, 24 and 25 for Sykora) while Tyler Kennedy tallied one for the second consecutive game. Even better than all of that? Marian Hossa, in his first real game with the Penguins, scored his first goal in Pittsburgh, registered an assist, and helped set-up the Penguins final goal (which was scored by Hal Freakin' Gill, of all people) with some nifty puck control along the boards.

Other random stuff the game:

- Between the first and second periods Pierre McGuire and Mike Milbury were bantering back and forth in the studio about the top teams in the Eastern Conference. Milbury likes the Canadiens (as he should, that's a quality team) and gushed about their quickness and talent level. Again, as he should. Then he had to go and throw it all out the window.

"The Montreal Canadiens have the best 1-2 punch at center in the Eastern Conference," Milbury said while screaming at Mcguire.

The Canadiens 1-2 punch at center, which consists of Tomas Plekanec and Saku Koivu, is certainly a dangerous duo. But the best? Better than Crosby and Malkin? I'm not going to sit here and say the Penguins are the best team in the East, or the most talented, or anything like that...but, I will most certainly sit here and say that Sidney Crosby and Evgeni Malkin are better than Tomas Plekanec and Saku Koivu. Frankly, it's not even close.

In terms of basic, straight from ESPN.com numbers, it's really not even up for debate:

Malkin-Crosby: 63 goals, 101 assists, 164 points
Plekanec-Koivu: 42 goals, 75 assists, 117 points

Plekanec and Koivu have played in every game for the Canadiens, while Crosby has missed seven weeks and still counting for the Penguins.

So, yeah, I'm going to go ahead and disagree with Mad Mike.

- During the same intermission, McGuire and Milbury switched topics and began talking about the suspension handed out by Colin Campbell - who hands out punishment among wrongdoers in the NHL like he's the leagues very own version Stalin...no sarcasm there at all...none - to Ducks defensemen Chris Pronger for taking his skate and stomping on the leg of Canucks forward Ryan Kesler.

Initially, Pronger avoided punishment for the same act that then Islanders goon Chris Simon received a 30-game suspension for, presumably because Chris Pronger is a superstar and Chris Simon is a no-talent thug with a weapon in his hands, and apparently, on his feet, too.

Then, some new footage came out with a much clearer - and gruesome - image of Pronger forcefully stomping his foot on on the leg of Kesler. The new image resulted in Campbell looking into the incident again, and ultimately extending the long arm of the law and suspending Pronger for eight games.

Bruce Ciskie at the Fanhouse says it best, I think:

The ruling: an eight-game suspension for Pronger, meaning he will be eligible to return for the Anaheim Ducks' regular-season finale. I'm sure he'll relish a little rest and then a tuneup game before the playoffs open.

Yup.

Anyway, Pierre McGuire felt the punishment was acceptable because in his words, "Pronger's situation was a reactionary play while Simon's was a predatory play."

Reactionary, predatory, it doesn't matter...he stomped on a guy. With a skate. It's Pronger's eighth suspension for various assortments of goonism (funny, that's the same number of suspensions Simon had when he was locked up for stomping on Jarkko Ruutu) and he walked away with a little slap on the wrist, at least as far as precedent is concerned.

-Pascal Dupuis picked up three assists today and has now registered seven points in eight games since being acquired by the Penguins in the Marian Hossa deal. It was easy for Dupuis to sneak in under the radar that day, seeing as how Hossa and Gill stole all the headlines, but he has been a rock-solid contributor both offensively and defensively. In short: The Penguins are not missing Colby Armstrong.

- What was the Flyers front office smoking when they handed Daniel Briere a contract that pays him over $8 million a year?

Pitt Looks To Continue Ownership Of MSG And Other Random Things

Photo from Post-Gazette

New York basketball fans should be thankful for the Big East Tournament as it's currently the only relevant basketball to be played at Madison Square Garden.

Tonight, the Pitt basketball team has a shot to continue its dominance (sort of) of the historic garden as it plays in its seventh Big East Conference Championship game in the last eight years.

A win for Pitt would be huge as it would be its second win of the season over Georgetown, and cap off a seemingly improbable tournament run which has already included wins over Cincinnati, Louisville and Marquette. If the Panthers cap this thing off with a win tonight, it should boost them up a few spots in the eyes of the mythical NCAA Tournament selection committee. Hey, it's something.

In other news...

- Sidney Crosby is going to miss the next three games.

- Georges Laraque is not happy with his suspension.

- The Pirates are already in mid-season form.

- The Steelers host two more free agents.

Penguins Overcome Injuries, Georges Laraque's Idiocy

With Sidney Crosby, Max Talbot and a cast of many out of the lineup with an assortment of injuries and ailments, the Penguins throttled Buffalo, 7-3, in front of a franchise record 35th sellout of the season.

Turning point of the game? Easy. Early in the second period, with the Penguins leading 1-0, Georges Laraque took a completely ridiculous and totally pointless 5-minute major for elbowing -- he knocked defenseman Nathan Paetsch out cold -- giving the Sabres a wide open window to take over the game.

Only they didn't. They couldn't. The Penguins did. They controlled the puck, smothered the Buffalo forwards and didn't allow the Sabres a single quality scoring chance the entire powerplay.
Then, with just over a minute remaining on the penalty, Jordan Staal drew a hooking penalty from Maxim Afinogenov which seemed to be the last effort Buffalo would display while it still had a shot to win. The Penguins capitalized moments later when Jeff Taffe deflected in a floater from Daryl Sydor.

Tyler Kennedy scored his first goal in 17 games, while Sergei Gonchar, Kris Letang, Evgeni Malkin, and Petr Sykora added goals for the Penguins. Career minor leaguer, and current bench warmer in Pittsburgh, Chris Minard scored his first career NHL goal in the romp. Good for him.

Ty Conklin started in net for the Penguins, presumably because he has displayed incredible ownership of the Buffalo Sabres this season, and was not tested for the first 40 minutes. He seemed to struggle in the third when Buffalo finally showed brief a touch of effort again -- way too little, way too late -- and managed to plop in three meaningless goals.

Other random shit:

- Laraque might be facing a suspension for his hit. At least he should be, I think. It didn't look all that bad, I mean, it's not like he sucker punched the guy from behind or drove his head into the ice or bashed him over the head with his stick, but...it was clearly a late hit, he clearly went in with his elbow up, and it was completely unnecessary. Boo.

- Evgeni Malkin is one goal away from 40 on the season. The Penguins haven't had a 40-goal scorer since Jaromir Jagr (52) and Alexie Kovalev (44) back in 2000-2001.

- Penguins color analyst Bob Errey was providing his commentary from between the two benches tonight, which led to the following exchange between Errey and Stan Savran on the Penguins pre-game show:

Savran: Now, Bob, you're one of the few people who has actually been able to sit on an NHL bench, can you give us an idea of what goes on down there? I remember a video during the '91 Stanley Cup Finals where Kevin Stevens and Bryan Trottier were absolutely crushing Brian Bellows. It was hilarious.

Errey: (laughing) Ohhhh, Stan. I knew you were going to ask me about that. We can't really talk about that here.

No, Bob, but we can talk about it here...



Yes, Brian Bellows, you're a superstar. You're the best, Bellows.

This of course begs the question, what was Bryan Trottier calling former Washington Capitals coach Jim Schoenfeld during this exchange of pleasantries during the 1996 playoffs?




- He may not tell the best jokes or be the glue that holds everything together -- I don't even know what that means -- but I think Pascal Dupuis is already better than Colby Armstrong.

It Took This Long

Not the last time Matt Morris will see this during 2008

...but I've finally stopped caring about the Pirates. The season opener is just a couple of weeks away, and I have zero interest. I haven't looked at a spring training box score, I have no idea who is winning the battle for the center field spot, and I've become resigned to the fact Steven Pearce, the teams minor league player of the year, is destined to start the season in triple-A despite having nothing left to prove at that level.

Should be a fun season......If you're a damn masochist.

The Video

Penguins Steal Two Points, Nick Backstrom Scores Game-Winner

Holding the No. 2 selection in the 2006 NHL draft, Penguins General Manager Ray Shero had a wide selection of talented players sitting in front of him in which to pick from: Jordan Staal, Jonathan Toews, Nick Backstrom. Any of those guys would have been an acceptable choice.

He ended up taking Staal, but that didn't stop Backstrom from scoring one of the Penguins biggest goals of the season today. With the game tied at two, and less than 30 seconds to play, the Penguins were in the middle of a frantic shift, throwing the kitchen sink at Capitals goalie Christobel Huet, when Backstrom scooped up a rebound in front and rifled a wrist shot into the back of the net. Pens win! Pens win!

What? But Backstrom plays for the Capitals?

Oops.

I have no idea what Backstrom was trying to do - I'm going to assume he was trying to clear the puck...or something - but he fired it in there like he meant to score. It was actually a great shot. Capitals mega-star, Alexander Ovechkin, dropped to the ice in disbelief, Huet collapsed in the crease like he just gave up the game-winning goal in game seven of the Stanley Cup finals, and the Capitals playoff hopes sat in the back of the net, laughing at them, as they gave away their second game in less than 24 hours.

It couldn't have been a bigger win for the Penguins - who for two periods were being outplayed for the third consecutive game - as they attempt to keep pace with the rest of the insanity that is the NHL's Eastern Conference.

Sidney Crosby gets credit for the game-winner, his second goal of the game, while Evgeni Malkin picked up three assists. Petr Sykora tallied his 21st goal of the season, and Marc-Andre Fleury responded to being pulled Thursday night with a 36-save performance. Jordan Staal picked up the empty-netter to seal the 4-2 win.

Since the game was on NBC today, we were treated to Pierre McGuire who once again voiced his displeasure for the Marian Hossa trade (because third-liners and shootout specialists are too much to give up) and pretty much guaranteed that the Penguins would not re-sign Hossa after the season. I'm not sure how to take that since, just a week prior to the trade deadline, McGuire was in the booth in Pittsburgh and said there was no way the Penguins would even trade for Hossa in the first place. So, yeah.

But, McGuire's disdain for the trade is simply his opinion, which he is certainly entitled to. It would be easier for me to accept if he weren't constantly churning out these, "Pittsburgh is going to become Tampa Bay north!" comments.

Tampa Bay north? Does that mean the Penguins are going to win the Stanley Cup? I hope so, because that would be incredible.


The Tampa Bay north comments come from - I assume - the fact the Lightning (winners of the 2004 Stanley Cup, the ultimate prize) put all of their eggs in the hands three franchise players: Vincent Lecavalier, Martin St. Louis and Brad Richards. Considering all of those guys are really, really good...they all cost a lot of money. And with the NHL's new salary cap (which is going to go up following this season, and even if it doesn't, the Penguins are still well below it) it makes it difficult to keep everybody. Due to these factors - or so we're led to believe - the Lightning traded Richards for some spare parts, magic beans and an okay-to-decent goalie which set off a storm of "NOBODY CAN EVER BUILD A DYNASTY IN THE NEW NHL" insanity.

The problem is, and nobody really points this out, is that on the very same day the Lightning traded Richards, they locked up a 31-year old defenseman (who isn't all that good defensively) named Day Boyle to a 7-year, $40 million contract. They decided, basically, that Dan Boyle was more important to the teams long-term success than Richards (which is crazy).

Can the Penguins keep Crosby, Malkin and Hossa? Yes. Will they? That remains to be seen. That's going to take quite a commitment from ownership. But is it possible? Absolutely. If it means trading Ryan Whitney to clear some space under the cap, even better.

Penguins Mauled By Panthers

On the surface, a 5-2 loss on the road doesn't appear to be all that terrible. Sure, you never want to lose 5-2, but hey, shit happens. Unfortunately, the only thing that might have made that game more lopsided is if actual Panthers had taken the ice against real flightless birds.

Much like the Penguins tonight, I've got nothin' else.

Fun With Pirates President Frank Coonelly

The Pirates may not have any new players heading into the 2008 season, but they do have an almost entirely new front office, including new team president, Frank Coonelly, who apparently will be answering questions from fans once a month on the teams official website. Today was the first such day.

While the Pirates did nothing this off-season in terms of actual player movement, they are quick to point out how they are going to restore pride and passion to the Pittsburgh Pirates, and give baseball fans in Pittsburgh a team they can once again be proud of. And don't forget about the atmosphere...OH THE ATMOSPHERE! It's great. Brighter days, they are ahead my friends. They are ahead.

Some quotes:

New manager, John Russell on November 5, 2007:

"It is my responsibility to restore the culture of pride and passion in the clubhouse. We will not be outworked or out-prepared. We will now assemble a team of coaches who are energetic and enthusiastic teachers. As a staff, our teaching will not end when a player makes it to the Major Leagues or when the Major League club heads north after Spring Training."

"Having coached here before is an advantage in the sense that I understand the challenges we face. I also understand the passion and energy of Pirates fans," said Russell. "The club has changed a lot since I was here in 2005. I am excited by the many talented, young players who have joined the club since 2005. With proper preparation and dedication, I believe we can restore a winning culture within our clubhouse."

Same day, different article...

“I can get the players to get the best out of themselves,” he said. “I’ve really been able to get a team atmosphere.”

More...

"We have the pieces to win now. It's just a matter of getting the passion, the accountability, the attention to detail. That's what works. My role and the staff's role is going to be huge and we're going to be diligent, but I like what we have."

Yeah, that's all well and good. But, for some reason, this all sounds terribly familiar. Let's rewind to October of 2005, when the Pirates named Jim Tracy as their new manager.

Then General Manager Dave Littlefield on the hiring of Tracy:

"I feel very positive that there's a new energy, a new level of excitement with the players in regards to new staff ...just a little more bounce to our step," Littlefield said.

Energy! Bounce! This has to end well.

And now, Jim Tracy himself:

"One word would pretty much summarize the few things that I had to say to them and that's 'accountability,' " said Tracy, who lived in the Colonial Oaks subdivision in Sarasota from 1988-2001. "We're going to be accountable.

"This is not a good place anymore, if you think mediocrity is going to be OK. It won't work."

But, it gets better. Let's rewind even further, like, say...to 2001, when the Pirates named hitting coach Lloyd McClendon manager.

"We've got to regain our dignity, we've got to regain our pride, and we're going to start doing that right away," McClendon said.

Yup.

And yet, the accountability?

"That time is over, there will be no more excuses. We've got to go out and do it the way it is supposed to be done. You will either be in with me or be out, and if you're out, I'll show you where the door is."

Thank you. And how about the fans? Can you give them a team they will be proud of? Can you restore the pride in Pittsburgh baseball?

"For the fans, I can't say they won't be disappointed at times, but they will never be embarrassed,"

Yup.

"I've been here in Pittsburgh when we've won and I've been here when we lost," he said. "I'm a fiery, competitive person, and anybody who knows me knows I wasn't afraid to fight. You have to learn how to win with dignity and lose with honor, but if some other teams cross that white line. ..."

I don't even know what any of that means.

The point is, we've heard this song before, and it sucks. Not quite as much as anything put out by Nickelback or Good Charlotte, but it's close. Accountability, passion, desire, culture, blah freakin' blah. It shouldn't be surprising that fans are tired of hearing this nonsense, year after year, executive after executive, manager after manager.

So, having said all of that, I decided to take advantage of the opportunity to ask an actual member of the Pirates front office - team president Frank Coonelly - a legitimate question in the form of an on-line chat. First, some other answers provided by Mr. Coonelly during the 35-minute session:

- "We will return the pride and passion of the Pirates in a number of ways. First, our players at the Major League level will work as hard as the Pittsburgh fans that support them do. Second, John Russell and his staff will constantly work to improve our Major League players and to insure that we play fundamentally sound, exciting baseball. Third, we will expand the work that we already do in the community, both in Pittsburgh and Bradenton, Fla. Fourth, we will build a foundation in the Minor Leagues that will provide us with the opportunity to consistently compete for championships. In short, we will build the organization the right way and our players will play the game the right way."

- "I couldn't be more pleased with the renovations made to Pirate City and McKechnie Field. Pirate City now includes a brand new, beautiful building that houses 75 player dorm rooms, five coaches suites, classrooms, recreational areas and our administrative offices. The Minor League players who are living there cannot stop raving about the facilities. McKechnie Field looks more beautiful than ever and will host the first night game in its history this Friday night against the Reds. I look forward to seeing the first night game played in Bradenton.