Yes, I'm Talking About Women's Soccer

Heading into the 1999 NFL playoffs, Wade Phillips, then Head Coach of the Buffalo Bills, made what I have always considered to be the worst coaching decision in recent sports history. Phillips, the mastermind that he is, benched his starting quarterback (Doug Flutie) in favor of career backup, and monumental disappointment, Rob Johnson before his teams opening round playoff game against the Tennessee Titans. The Bills put together a 10-5 record with Flutie calling the shots, and in a meaningless week 17 contest with the Indianapolis Colts, Johnson played the game of his life in a 31-6 drubbing. Phillips, impressed by this accomplishment, decided to roll into the playoffs with Johnson, not Flutie, his starting quarterback for the first 15 games of the season, as his quarterback.

Needless to say, the Bills lost the game while Johnson wet the bed to the tune 10-of-22 passing for 130 yards. Had it not been for that games ending (Home run throwback) this colossal act of idiocy would have received the mocking it deserved.

This leads us to Greg Ryan. And who is Greg Ryan you ask? Well, Wade Phillips thinks that Greg Ryan is an idiot.

Greg Ryan has been the anonymous manager of the only U.S. National team to not disappoint the stars and stripes on the international stage in recent years - The United States womens soccer team. An anonymous guy leading an anonymous team who did nothing but win a lot of games, actually, entering today it had been 51 games since they last suffered defeat.

Helping to lead the way for the United States was goalkeeper Hope Solo, who had been carrying an impressive streak of 300 consecutive minutes without allowing a goal in this month's World Cup.

Today, the United States was taking the pitch against Brazil in a semi-final contest, and Greg Ryan, anonymous womens soccer manager, made himself the focal point of every sports talk show in the country, an amazing accomplishment.

Ryan, in a move that only Wade Phillips could comprehend, benched his red hot keeper in favor of 36-year old Brianna Scurry. Scurry, for the record, had not played a meaningful soccer game for the United States since the 2004 Olympics. Ryan's rationale for the move was that Scurry has big game experience (and to be fair, she did) and played well against Brazil in the past (and to be fair, she did). But, three years?

Brazil had a field day with the rusty Scurry and rolled to a 4-nil win, the worst defeat in the history of the womens national team.

After the game, Solo was obviously frustrated. Pissed off more like it.

"It was the wrong decision, and anyone who knows anything about the game knows that," Solo said. "There's no doubt in my mind that I would have made those saves."......"The fact of the matter is that it is not 2004 anymore," Solo said. "It's 2007 and you have to live in the present and you can't live in the past..."It does not matter what someone did in an Olympic gold medal game three years ago. Now is what matters and that's what I think."

Yikes. It's possible, if not likely, that Ryan is going to lose his job for this, and despite the recent domination of the program, I can't say that it's unwarranted. This is pinch hitting for Alex Rodriguez in game four of the playoffs with Scott Brosious as he is today. This is Rob Johnson. This is...insane.

The Steelers...With Special Teams?

For years, seems more like decades, the Steelers yearly Achilles heel has seemingly been their lackluster, ugly and often times disaster of a special teams unit. Long kick returns, blocked field goals, blown coverages, touchbacks on Punts, fumbled kicks, etc. etc. etc. But, Hark! Through three games in 2007, the much maligned unit has been, well, pretty damn strong. The only real blemish was the 60+ yard return from Buffalo's Terrance McGee in week two - a return that shouldn't have been as McGee clearly stepped out of bounds about 30 yards before he was ultimately hauled down.

So what the hell is the difference between this year (so far) and the past, oh, I don't know, 20 years?

Is it Coach Mike Tomlin's willingness to use some starters on special teams (ie: James Harrison, Brett Kiesel, Bryant McFadden)? Is it the selection of Punter Daniel Sepulveda? Is it the Coaching Staffs tireless attention to the unit throughout training camp? Is Jeff Reed roiding (I'm kidding)?

It's most likely a combination of all of those things. Consider this through three games:

- Jeff Reed has already registered four touchbacks on kickoffs - That matches his total from 2006.

- Of Sepulveda's nine punts overall, only one of them has been returned - for zero yards. The best way to protect your coverage team, obviously, is to make it so the other guy has absolutely no shot at making a play.

- Sepulveda has placed four punts inside the ten-yard line. In 2006, Chris Gardocki had zero.

- Aside from those four inside the ten, Sepulveda has also put two additional punts inside the 20.

Wrap all of those things together in a neat little package, and you get the Steelers kicking the ball away 31 times, and on 12 of those kicks, the opposition has had no opportunity for a return.
Radical.

Due to Reed's newly acquired ability to put the ball in the end zone, Sepulveda's pinpoint accuracy inside the ten, and the strong work of the gunners, opposing offenses have started ten drives at, or inside, their own 20-yard line. No wonder Dick's defense is teeing off.

And let's not forget the contributions of the newest Steeler, return man Allen Rossum. Rossum has already made his presence felt with a 98-yard kick off return in week three, a play that destroyed any momentum the 49ers may have built on their opening field goal drive.

Mike Tomlin on Rossum following the week three contest:

He can stick his foot in the ground and change direction. He has great straight-line speed, his zero-to-60 as they say, is very good and he can put his foot in the ground and change direction.

Yeah. Exciting. Not quite as exciting as, say, Ricardo Colclough, but exciting.

And now might be a good time to mention that the Pittsburgh Steelers are currently the only team in the NFL to have a punter who has also recovered an onside kick.

There’s a saying that we have in our locker room: “The more you can do …” He’s capable of doing a lot of things. He’s an athlete. He’s a kicker, he’s a football player. We trust his hands. If you have a punter with bad hands, you don’t sleep very well. Our punter has good hands, he’s on the hands team, he made a nice play for us.

Crazy.

In Case You Haven't Heard: Ken Whisenhunt And Russ Grimm Used To Coach For The Steelers

Really.

It's true.

I Had Absolutely No Idea.

I WIsh Somebody Would Talk About This.

Seriously.

Yeah.

Get Some Sleep, Damnit

Okay, so it's 11:34 Wednesday night. I'm sitting here, exhausted, watching reruns of Family Guy (God, I hate that show) and listening to old Spin Doctors CD's. I stared blankly at a computer screen for eight consecutive hours, came home, and transcribed and formatted the entire Mike Tomlin press conference, surprisingly, the most productive thing I did all day. So why am I sitting here now, when I should be sleeping? I have no idea. Thoughts are pouring out of my mind like diarrhea of the brain.

The next three days of my real job are setting up to suck, much more than usual. It'll be much better when we get through Saturday. The only thoughts occupying my brain are Steelers Vs. 49ers. Matt Spaeth. Frank Gore. Hines Ward. I think the last time we played the 49ers J.J. Stokes played for them. J.J. Stokes? Where did that name come from? Speaking of which, tonight on Deal or No Deal Kordell Stewart was on. No joke, Kordell Stewart. Him and a host of former NFL stars. Terrell Davis. Jerry Rice......and Wayne Chrebet? That's even more obscure than Kordell Stewart.

Hey, the Pirates are playing. I didn't even know they were on a west coast trip. They're winning 3-2 in the top of the sixth. Chris Young is pitching for the Padres. In hindsight, Chris Young was a part of perhaps two of the worst Major League Baseball trades in quite some time, and sadly, and not so surprisingly, the Pirates were on the wrong end of one of those. I guess it's a positive that we didn't trade Adrian Gonzalez along with him...that's something, right? No? Okay. It's not.

This game is going in slow motion. Perhaps it's because i'm half asleep. Perhaps it's because Ronny Paulino is batting right now, and everything he does is half speed. Including that double play. Wayne Chrebet wouldn't have done that.

11:45. I should probably be getting some sleep. But I can't. I don't want too. Not yet. I love the fact Nyjer Morgan wears those stirrups. I hate the fact he can't hit a link and is drawing rave reviews from the Pirates because of how he handles himself, whatever that means. He's made some great catches. Lanny is asking bob Walk 140 questions that Walk has absolutely no interest in answering. These Pirates commercials with that yinzer guy are the worst. Just awful.

11:50 and Jessica Alba is parading around on my TV screen in her underwear. Really, it's Jessica Alba. That sure as hell beats Cesar Izturis parading around in his uniform, with a bat in his hand. Of course, I could also be watching womens bowling on ESPN2. Womens bowling, hell, i'd rather watch Ronny Paulino. Hey, Nyjer Morgan is batting again, and he's 2-for-2...well, he was 2-for-2...until now. I still love the stirrups. Rob King has such a striking resemblance to Dave Littlefield. Uncanny.

More womens bowling. And yet, we can't get the NHL on something other than Versus. What? Couldn't they land anymore poker tournaments on ESPN2? More fine programming from the supposed world wide leader in sports. I'd rather see some English soccer, or, if at all possible, Aussie Rules Football. Those guys are psycho.

Ian Snell is cruising, and it's about damn time. Surprised he hasn't blamed anyone for something yet. I hope he holds on. He won't. They won't. IT doesn't matter.

I'm going to bed.

Random YouTube

Football Musings From Week Two

Listening to the Steelers pre-game show on WDVE yesterday, Ellis Cannon ran off a laundry list of Buffalo Bills statistics on how they are undefeated when J.P. Losman has a quarterback rating over 100, Lee Evans catches a pass over 40 yards and when they have a running back rush for over 100 yards. So, in other words, when the Bills players play well...the Bills win? Fascinating!

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Perhaps i'm jumping to conclusions far too soon, I mean, really, it's only two games, but two of the most controversial picks in one of the Steelers most controversial drafts in recent memory are already paying dividends.

Third round draft pick Matt Spaeth - WHAT ARE THEY PICKING ANOTHER TIGHT END FOR!?!? - has only caught three passes, but, two of them have gone for touchdowns while the third went for a first down. That, my friends, is efficiency.

Fourth round draft pick, punter Daniel Sepulveda, was perhaps the most scrutinized pick, and so far has been a gigantic upgrade over Chris Gardocki.

Consider this:

- Sepulveda has punted seven times this season - None of them have been returned. This is a crucial thing for a team who has a major question mark in its kick coverage unit.

- Of his seven punts, four of them have already been downed inside the ten-yard line. Consider that last season Chris Gardocki had zero punts downed inside the ten-yard line all season.

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It's incredible to see how the Cleveland Browns were in a total meltdown mode after week one, and then come back out in week two and lay 51 points on the Cincinnati Bengals. Last week, Jamal Lewis was running like his career was over. This week, he ran for 220 yards. Last week, the Browns offense as a unit couldn't get out of its own way. This week, it put up 51. Last week, the Browns defense gave up 34 points. This week, it gave up 45...well, I guess some things do stay the same...

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Normally, I could care less about the New York Jets, but considering they were playing the Baltimore Ravens on Sunday, I had no choice but to cheer, and cheer passionately, for them. For three quarters it was a frustrating, boring game, as Kellen Clemens was harassed by the Ravens defense while the Ravens offense played like the Ravens offense. A 20-3 deficit looked to be insurmountable for Clemens. And then, slowly but surely, the Jets scratched and clawed their way back into the game. A field goal. A nifty grab by Chris Baker in the back corner of the end zone. A three-and-out by the defense...suddenly, the Jets were 80 yards away from tying the score. On the first play of the Jets final drive, Clemens connected with Jerrico Cotchery over the middle as he raced 50 yards to the Ravens 30-yard line.

Now we're in business.

Two plays later, Clemens tossed a strike down the middle of the field to a wide open Justin McCareins who found a soft spot in the Ravens defense and was a mere step from walking into the end zone. Trouble is, McCareins dropped the ball. Even worse than that, Clemens targeted McCareins in the end zone on the Jets final play, only to have another potential game-tying touchdown slip through his hands into the waiting arms of Ray Lewis to seal the deal.

Five Quick Takes

1. Through two games, Mario Williams has more touchdowns than Reggie Bush.

2. Think the Falcons regret trading Matt Schaub?

3. Jon Kitna returned to the Lions game after suffering a concussion in the same game. I don't care if he was medically cleared to play, that is just the height of stupidity.

4. Following the game, Lions backup Quarterback Dan Orlovsky demonstrated that he too suffered a concussion during the game - An incredible accomplishment considering he didn't even step on the field...

"The Colts can have Peyton, the Patriots can have Tom, but we wouldn't trade Jon Kitna for anyone else in the league."

With Matt Millen in charge, I wouldn't doubt that.

5. Eagles fans give Reno Mahe a standing ovation...Ricardo Colclough is not impressed.

September Baseball: Who Cares?

The NL Central is perhaps the most interesting pennant race in the Majors during this September stretch run. Three teams separated by three games, three teams determined to blow it by dropping winnable games against the Pirates, three teams who probably don't deserve a trip to the playoffs even though one of them will emerge from the pile with the title, "division champion."

Of course, I said the same thing last year about the 83-win St. Louis Cardinals who went on to win the whole damn thing. Shows what I know, of course.

The Pirates, who have been crushing the hopes and dreams of Pittsburgh baseball fans for the past 15 years, have spent the past month spreading the wealth as they've helped, in just a small way, crush some of the hopes and dreams of baseball fans in other cities - Milwaukee, Chicago and St. Louis to be exact.

The Pirates, who defeated the Brewers 7-4 this afternoon, are coming off a 10-game stretch against the three NL Central contenders where they went 6-4, including series wins over Milwaukee and Chicago, and a split in a four game series with the Cardinals. The Pirates, the team nobody wants, have been playing a major part in the fate of the National League Central, and could continue to do so as they still have three games remaining with each the Cubs and Cardinals, including a 3-game set against St. Louis to close the season.

Unfortunately, that's all the Pirates are playing for, as one more loss will lock them into their 15th consecutive losing season.

*Sigh*

The most depressing thing about this, of course, is the fact for the second straight year 84 wins - tops - is going to come away with a playoff birth in this sad sack division. And we can't even get to that level.

It's incredible to look at the team-by-team stats and see only the Cubs with a positive run differential.

Cubs: +38
Brewers: 0
Reds: - 57
Pirates: -69
Cardinals - 80
Astros: -105

Perhaps Tony Larussa is some sort of super genius after all? For that team, having been outscored by 80 runs entering tonight, to be within a stones throw of first place is a small miracle.

I can sit here today and say that over the last three months i've probably sat down and watched five Pirates games. I'm not even interested. I could care less about Steven Pearce's strong September, Tom Gorzalenney's quest for 15 wins, or the fact Jack Wilson - who has quietly put together a really strong season - will finish the season with an OPS higher than Jason Bay.

It just doesn't matter.

There are reports the Pirates are going to name Frank Coonelly their new CEO, and soon after that, probably, a new General Manager to go along with him.

The guy everyone seems to have the biggest love for is Toronto's Tony Lacava who is, you guessed it, A LOCAL GUY! Not that, "local guy," is something that makes one qualified for the job. My worthless suggestion is Cleveland Indians Assistant General Manager Chris Antonetti. Other names tossed around have been Ruben Amaro Jr. (Phillies), Jack Zduriencik (Brewers), and Rich Hahn (White Sox).

Whoever the club selects will have some small shoes to fill. Replacing Chuck Noll or Bill Cowher this is not. Actually, it would probably an attractive job. If you perform a miracle and bring the team back to even somewhat competitive baseball, you'll be a hero. If you're the next Cam Bonifay or Dave Littlfield, you're just fulfilling expectations. Exciting, isn't it?

Penguins Training Camp One Week Away

Lost in the madness of the upcoming Steelers season is the incredible fact Penguins training camp is just a week away, and the season itself is just a short month away.

This season is already shaping up to be one of the most interesting and exciting seasons the flightless birds have had in, well, quite a while. I mean, last year was great and all, but expectations this year are through the roof, which is both intriguing and dangerous.

Gone are Jocelyn Thiabult, Josef Melichar and Michel Oullett; In are Petr Sykora, Daryl Sydor and Danny Sabourin.

I'm still hoping General Manager Ray Shero finds a way to add another defenseman, because other than Sydor - who is a welcome addition - this is pretty much the same defense that got its butt handed to it in a paper sack last year against Ottawa. I mean, Sydor can still play a little, and it'll be great to have him on the second power play unit instead of Brooks Orpik or Josef Melichar, but the Penguins can't possibly expect to enter the playoffs with, basically, the same group of defensemen and expect a different result.

Sure, Kris Letang is high on potential, but he's not much different than every other defensemen on the roster: An offensive-defensemen. Another season in the minors wouldn't be a horrible thing for him.

Danny Markov is still looking for a job, and while he's not exactly Chris Pronger or Niklas Lidstrom, he still has some fire and could be the type of defensemen the Penguins need to throw out there against Dany Heatly and Daniel Alfredson. You know, the type of guy to HACK THE BONE!!!

The Penguins, by the way, continue to be marketing maniacs as several of their young stars - including the big cheese, Sidney Crosby - hand delivered random fans season ticket packages today.

Instead of passing pucks, a few Penguins spent Thursday passing out season tickets. As a show of their appreciation for tremendous fan support, Pittsburgh Penguins players hand-delivered season tickets to 24 season ticket-holders throughout the Pittsburgh area.

Sidney Crosby, Evgeni Malkin, Marc-Andre Fleury, Ryan Whitney, Colby Armstrong and Maxime Talbot made the deliveries to the fans, who were selected at random.

What a novel concept, fielding a competitive team and being fan friendly. Perhaps the Pirates should be taking notes?

So It Begins: Steelers Vs. Browns

This is what it's all about. Opening the season with your bitter rival. A city whose inhabitants are so much like you it almost seems wrong to hate them, but at the same time, it seems oh so right. Steelers-Browns games always seem to have some sort of unexpected insanity to them regardless of the records. A captivating storyline that you look back on years later and say, "hey, remember that game against the Browns?" The comeback. Chris Gardocki giving the Steelers bench (and the viewing audience) the finger. Joey Porter and William Green getting kicked out of a game...before the game even starts. James Harrison body slamming some random sadsack fan who is now banned from every stadium in the city of Cleveland.

Who knows what this years chapter holds. Browns cornerback Leigh Bodden decided to get the debauchery started early by getting himself arrested outside the Cleveland Airport Wednesday night. According to Coach Romeo Crennell, he's going to play, which is good for the Browns since he's like, their best player.

Should be a fun weekend.

Any Given Saturday

A few years ago, when the Cincinnati Bengals were at the bottom of the NFL food chain, there was a running joke that perhaps, for the sake of competition, the NFL should replace them with the Miami Hurricanes, who at the time, were a powerhouse in the college ranks. As the Bengals eventually became respectable again, and the Hurricanes dynasty fell off, the joke switched over to replacing the Houston Texans with the USC Trojans, because, you know...the Texans suck.

Of course, nobody ever honestly thought such a thing should happen, but there would always be those, "who would win between (insert worst NFL team) and (insert best NCAA team) if they played a game?"

The answer of course, is simple.

The NFL team. Every. Single. Time. There would be no any given Sunday about it. The worst NFL team, perhaps on its worst day, would run circles around even the best NCAA team. Think about it, even on the best teams in college, how many of those players actually go on to the NFL? And i'm not talking All-Pro's in the NFL, i'm talking just getting a look in training camp only to be cut at the end of August. The answer is not many.

I'm always reminded of the talent gap between the NFL and the NCAA whenever I turn on a USC game and see Pete Carroll on the sidelines. Pete Carroll is the field general behind an NCAA powerhouse. If that isn't a damning indictment of the talent gap between the two levels, i'm not sure what is.

Back to the point at hand (what is the point? I'm not sure), I thought of all this today because Appalachian State, a Division 1-AA program, marched itself into "The Big House" to take on No. 5-ranked Michigan in what was no doubt inked in to be a laugher. A blowout. A beating so bad that people would discredit Michigan's inevitable win because of its cowardly scheduling of a 1-AA team to open its season.

Michigan was showing up to score 40 points in the first half, get their fourth team offense a few reps, and chalk an easy win up in the W column.

Appalachian State was showing up to get the $400,000 check Michigan was handing them for the honor of being a punching bag.

Only, that's not what happened.

Appalachian State actually had the nerve - the audacity! - to not only give Michigan a fight, but to win the damn game.

I didn't see one play of this game (and thanks to the idiocy that is The Big Ten Network, neither did anyone else) but when a 1-AA team beats the No. 5-ranked team in their backyard, you really don't need to see the game. The score speaks for itself.

Because of the brilliance (and by brilliance, I mean stupidity) that is the BCS system, Michigan's dreams of winning a National Title are pretty much finished one week in, while Appalachian State takes its gigantic check to the bank and celebrates its 15-minutes of fame. It's a win-win for them...and a gigantic lose-lose for the Wolverines.

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Pitt Defeats Eastern Michigan

Behind the fearless leadership of the mustache, the Pitt Panthers opened their season Saturday night with what had to be a boring 27-3 victory over Eastern Michigan at Heinz Field.

It appears that starting quarterback Bill Stull suffered some sort of thumb injury in the third quarter, and he did not return. Kevan Smith took over and went 3-of-5 for 21 yards. Stull was 14-0f-21 for 175 yards and a touchdown before leaving.

Lerod Stephens-Howling led all players with 72 yards (long run of 29) on 16 carries, while highly touted freshman Lesean McCoy had 70 yards on 16 carries with a long run of 20.

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Other Local College Scores/Results

- Penn State wins a nail biter over Florida International 59-0. What's so International about Florida anyway?

- West Virginia scored 62 points against Western Michigan. Close game.

- Bucknell 28 Duquesne 19

- Dayton 23 Robert Morris 12

- California (PA) 34 Glenville State 13. I was at this game...see...

- Indiana (PA) 36 Saint Francis 0 (Thursday night, Scrimmage). IUP's first game is Saturday at 2:00 against Cheyney.